How I Feel About Each of My Books

Little trip down memory lane

Jun 01, 2025

Some months ago, I was watching Ta-Nehisi Coates on tour for his latest book, The Message. He did some banging interviews in those weeks, laying down some home truths about Israel and Palestine to an audience that revered him, challenging and pushing back against stories that had such power in the US context. For example:

But I must confess, there was one part of an interview he did that stuck with me, and it had nothing to do with politics at all. It was a question about how Coates felt about each of his five previously published books.

I really felt that segment. He talked about which book he loves, which he feels was misunderstood… he talks about these pieces of work in a way that only the author can, and I ate it up.

Unfortunately, I can’t find nor remember which interview that was (so if you do know, please drop it in the comments!) But it did make me reflect on my own relationship to my published works, which I thought I’d share with you today!

So, in order of oldest to newest…

Yassmin’s Story

Ah, the original memoir. I was 23 when I sold this, 24 when it came out. I was young, earnest, and had absolutely no understanding of how lucky I was to publish this work, and how the month-long book tour and national marketing campaign was not something every writer got. To be fair, people told me that at the time, but I was still working as an engineer, remember? I did not think I’d be writing another book. I was just happy to go along for the ride.

The second version came out in 2017, just as my life blew up. How do I feel about Yassmin’s Story now? Mixed. I mostly conceive of it as a snapshot in time, a book that says less about me as a writer and more about who I was as a driven young person, obsessed with making the most of every opportunity and fully believing in my ability to change the world. This is the book that is closest to what people wanted and expected from me, which is probably why it is quite possibly my most commercially successful book to date (in terms of Australian book sales).

I find it difficult to revisit this book. My politics were less evolved (though fortunately, my values were pretty much the same). If you want the most wholesome version of me, this is where to find her. I’m just not that person anymore.

You Must Be Layla

The book that honestly, I think most people know me for? This little bad boy has done gangbusters in schools especially, selling enough that I earned out my (small) advance within a year (which is not super common!) I get told every year how many copies are being borrowed out of libraries, and to my delight, the book is still doing strong, mashallah. So from that point of view, I’m gently proud of this one. It’s like the gutsy kid succeeding against the odds. YMBL was my first work of fiction, the project that kept me sane after I’d moved from Australia to London in late 2017/2018. It is a simple story told plainly, but it continues to resonate with readers around the world. A girl inventor fighting back against her bully? What’s not to love?

There’s even an illustrated Penguin Readers edition that came out - I mean, how cool!!!

Listen, Layla

Ah, the sequel!

This was the first book that began to get some award recognition, getting longlisted in a few different places and even getting a Kirkus review. I wrote this book during the 2018/2019 Sudanese revolution, and so even though this is a book for young readers, it is full of stories of revolt, protest, change and transformation. This was the first book I wrote where I began to entertain the idea of being a ‘writer’ for real, someone who had control over the story and text. I was pleased to be able to introduce some super meaty ideas to the readers, and LL is probably the book that gave me the confidence to begin writing what I wanted to write and not what I thought I should.

For whatever reason, perhaps because it is a sequel, or because it was published during COVID, Listen, Layla didn’t reach the audience I hoped it would. It still did okay, Alhamdulilah, but you know. It’s an underappreciated one.

Talking About a Revolution

Oh, my misunderstood child!

TAAR is the non-fiction collection of essays that I had my heart set on writing for as long as I had written… but gosh, folks. People were not picking up what I was putting down!

For me, this is my most honest piece of work, one that shows how I have developed as a writer and as a thinker over my twenties. It reflects who I am in its wide range of topics (from citizenship to cryptocurrency) and in the essays varying levels of sophistication (half the pieces are previously published works from my twenties, the other I wrote for this collection at the age of thirty), in its somewhat subversive approach. The response I got was that it was too much for folks, unwieldy, not focused enough, not what people wanted. Some felt like the title was misleading, others poked holes in older essays and ignored the recontextulisation offered, and most, I realised, just wanted something different from me. This was my first big piece of non-fiction work since I’d left Australia, and I think people wanted me to talk about that. They wanted a tell all, a confession, a rallying cry, something. There are elements of that throughout the text, but I was not interested in writing on someone else’s terms. I wrote what I wanted to.

Turns out, writing on your own terms is great for your soul, not always great for the balance sheet :P So, this is the work I am most protective of. I still point people towards it if they want to get to know my writing, but always with the knowledge it will probably confuse more than impress. C’est la vie!

(If you’re one of the few that has read this book, what do you think? Would love more feedback because I don’t 100% understand how people have responded to TAAR).

Stand Up and Speak Out Against Racism

Last but not least, SUSOAR.

The book that was commissioned following the great BLM resurgence of 2020. This was not something I expected to write, but I am super professionally proud of what we created. It’s a reference text I believe will stand the test of time, with as much to teach adults as it does young people. Possibly the least known of my works - the only one I didn’t really do a tour for - but the most awarded and critically acclaimed, reflecting the amount of research, distillation, consideration and incredible illustration work by Aleesha Nandhra. Arguably my least artistic work, but the most impactful one? Who knows.

Well, there you go! There are, of course, the books that never saw the light of day (one historical fiction, one technology non-fiction), the anthologies I contributed to (It’s Not About the Burqa, New Daughters of Africa, The Puffin Book of Big Dreams, Life’s Short Talk Fast), and the truth that how I feel about each of these works changes as the years go by. But all in all, I feel grateful. Maintaining a career as a writer is far more difficult than publishing a single book. Publishing is a risk averse business. You’re only as good as your last sales report, and that report can be brutal (Trust. I am no Ta Nehisi Coates!) But we do our best, try ride the wave for as long as it’s cresting, and hope readers get something out of the work.

As you know, next year is a big one (inshallah). The first of the SILVERBROOK teen fantasy series comes out in January, and then the literary fiction novel AT SEA is out in May. I have no idea how I will feel about them as they are released into the world, or how readers and critics will receive them. But I will keep y’all posted, because what else is Substack for but a way to work through feelings?! Hopefully we can have some fun along the way!

Please let me know in the comments what you thought of all this — too self indulgent? Has it brought up a bunch of questions? Do you feel differently about the books than I think readers do? Tell me everything, and see you next week (inshallah!)